No More Cat Pee For Me

I know it might be hard to imagine, but I’ve had to avail myself of therapy a time or two to become such a model of mental health. I also have Mr. Punkin to thank. Mr. Punkin weighed about 16 pounds and was a feline. I’m not sure why he got so fat. I’m thinking maybe he ate too much. He was quite a heap o’kitty. He also had an issue with urinating. He did it everywhere. He would look you in the eye, lift his tail, and spray the wall (pick a wall, any wall). Sometimes he used the box, mostly he didn’t. And yes he was neutered. And yes he was neutered as a wee little itty bitty kitty. And yes we practiced good box hygiene. And yes we tried changing brands of kitty litter. And yes we took him to the vet and made sure he wasn’t diabetic, didn’t have a thyroid problem, a bladder infection or any of a variety of “itis” conditions. He was just a pisser (or as they say in New England a “pissa”.)

I was going to college at night, working a full-time time job in a restaurant, and was recently married to Ron. When I wasn’t studying or working, I was usually crawling around the floor cleaning up cat urine. I can’t stand the smell of kitty wee. I became sensitized to the odor during Mr. Punkin’s reign. I was losing my mind and decided to see a therapist. Early in treatment with her, she had me make of list of things that were stressing me. I wrote down three things and I don’t remember number 2 or 3, but I clearly remember number 1 - CAT PEE.

When I read the list in my therapist’s office, I had my very first “aha” moment ever (long before Oprah made “aha” moments a household word.) I might not be able to readily solve stressor 2 or 3, but I could do something about cat pee. I’ve had lots of pets and I’m a commitment maker when I get an animal. I don’t take divorce lightly. But as I read that list, Mr. Punkin’s fate was sealed. He was being voted off the island.

We took him to the humane society and lied. Well we really didn’t lie - I was allergic to him and I was taking allergy shots, but we weren’t leaving him for that reason. He was a pissa. I didn’t want to tell the nice folks at the Humane Society about his problem. I wanted him to have a chance at adoption. I’m hoping I’ll be forgiven for fibbing and I’m hoping Mr. Punkin found a nice home.

Last week I told you about my jazzy new MacBook. Jaz and I are getting along really well. He’s doesn’t have to be rebooted (like never). I haven’t had to talk to any people in India, Canada, or Jamaica. He multitasks really well. He interacts nicely with other programs. He’s really cute and most importantly he doesn’t look me in the eye and pee.